Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Financial Fuck myself writing experiment part 6 - I'm doing as poorly as the Blue Jays...

Financial fuck myself writing experiment - Part 6

I went through a year and a half of writing absolutely nothing. That shit’s fucked up. I had to unfuck the situation by making threats to financially fuck myself in an attempt to fuck the laziness out of... myself...with a big rusty pole or a splintery post (anyone know what song I'm quoting there?). Each week I set a goal, I will write X amount of pages on a feature, or sitcom, webseries, whatever. If I don’t reach my goal, my wallet takes a vicious raping.

RECAP Of the most recent writing challenge:
The due date was 420, due time: 4:20 PM. An HQ of weed...I mean soil, was on the line.
I needed to either write episode 2 of my sitcom, a short film (I always leave a short film as an option, as it’s been a while since I’ve directed a short), or 3 episodes of my webseries “The Human Project”.

Yeah, I texted my friend on 420 asking for an extension to Sunday night and I’d add in an extra 1.5 grams if I lost.  Then on Sunday, I woke up hung over as shit from the big 5 year college reunion party the night before.  I tried to write, but man...writing while hungover is just...not...good!  It’s like trying to take a shit after someone slipped a constipation pill into your drink.  So, I’m now 2 for 5.  I’m currently playing 400 ball, which is like...Blue Jays bad.  I need to win the next challenge to be better than the baseball the blue jays are playing.

The due date is April 30th, 11:59 PM.  5 grams is on the line.  Same person from challenge #1, and 3 and 5 is the enforcer.
There’s a short film that I tried to write a few times, but was never happy with.  I’ve ditched the 8 pages I’d written previously and have started fresh with new characters, but same concept.  Just like my stoner sitcom, it’s something I’ve tried to write in the past, but was never happy with what I came up.  Now I’ve changed the female character, as I’m somewhat basing her on someone I’ve gotten to know recently; as a result, I think she’s a much funnier character than the original female character I just pulled out of my ass.  There you go, folks.  Sometimes it’s better to use real people as inspiration than pull people out your anus. 
Recap of the previous writing challenges:
EXPERIMENT 4 - I was supposed to write 2 where I recap the most over-rated and worst movies of 2012, and a blog about Roger Ebert. As you can see, those blogs have not been posted, so I “lost” the challenge. If I had lost, I was going to paypal $25 to two people who posted their paypal email address or messaged me with it. Well...

A bunch of people did read my blog, but no one bothered to leave me their paypal address, therefore I didn’t lose any money after all. So ha! Take that bitches! You lost an opportunity for an easy $25. Now I still do want to write those blogs, but I’ll save it for another time.
What can I say? I had a busy week-end, I got lazy, and I noticed that no one bothered to send me their paypal address...laziness got the best of me again. So sort of thank you for not posting your paypal addresses as it would have sucked to lose $50, but for next your paypal address. Tough love is what I need to not be lazy. It looks like I have a drunken week-end ahead of me, so that $50 I didn’t lose will likely end up getting me drunk.

Experiment 3: I had to either write the pilot to my sitcom (22 pages) or a short film and it’s due on April 1, 11:59 PM. If I lost, I’d have to give my friend a free HQ of weed.

THE RESULT: I WON!! This was pretty cool, because this sitcom pilot is something I’ve wanted to write for a long time. I’ve taken quite a few stabs at it and was never happy with what I wrote; I kept re-starting. I would often get to about 6 pages, re-read it, hate it, and delete it and start from the beginning.

It was nice to finally write it all out, flesh out all the characters, and write in a few teases at where certain storylines and characters would go with future episodes. It was about 25 pages I wrote. I think I’m happy with the characters I’ve come up with, and I like to think it’s pretty funny stuff. I perhaps did recycle a few jokes from older scripts, but for the most part all the jokes were new, and just pulled out of my ass while I was writing. I've gotten the script notes today, and I'll re-visit and re-write the script in maybe a week. Here's the blog for financial fuck myself part 3:

EXPERIMENT 2 - SHIT GETS EPIC – GOAL WRITES 10 PAGES OF THE EPIC SCRIPT... (a chain script concept between 3 writers, of the script being passed back and forth to each other to do whatever the fuck we want to it). Here's the link to the blog of part 2: 

WHAT WAS AT STAKE? A deal with 2 people. $40 on the line for Warren, and a permanent ban on myself to ever try to force my musical taste on Scott again. That means no more showing upto his house and being like, “Yo, this emo band is awesome!! Here’s their cd”
And him being like...SIGH..."okay, I guess I’ll listen to it."
RESULT – I WON, MOTHERFUCKERS! Scott, I’ll burn a CD of The Menzingers next time I see you. They’re fucking awesome! They’re like a punk rock version of the Tragically Hip.

EXPERIMENT 1 – WRITE 30 PAGES OF A FEATURE. I LOST (came up short. I wrote 20 pages), and had to buy a quarter ounce of weed and give it to a friend of mine for free. Here's the link to the original blog:


2 wins
3 losses

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